Bamwe mu b’igitsina gore cyangwa igitsina gabo bakunze kurangwa no gushuka abo bakundana cyangwa bashakanye bagamije kugenzura ibitekerezo byabo no kubigarurira.
Nyamara abahanga mu by’iyigamiryango bavuga ko imibanire y’abashakanye ikwiye kurangwa no kwizerana gusesuye kugirango urugo rugende neza.Ababavugako akenshi umuntu ugutwara muri ubu buryo aba atagukunze ahubwo yaragusanze ku zindi mpamvu zirimo imitungo,cyangwa ubuhingiro bw’igihe gito.
Gusa ku rundi ruhande ngo bishobora no (...)

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Bamwe mu b’igitsina gore cyangwa igitsina gabo bakunze kurangwa no gushuka abo bakundana cyangwa bashakanye bagamije kugenzura ibitekerezo byabo no kubigarurira.

Nyamara abahanga mu by’iyigamiryango bavuga ko imibanire y’abashakanye ikwiye kurangwa no kwizerana gusesuye kugirango urugo rugende neza.Ababavugako akenshi umuntu ugutwara muri ubu buryo aba atagukunze ahubwo yaragusanze ku zindi mpamvu zirimo imitungo,cyangwa ubuhingiro bw’igihe gito.

Gusa ku rundi ruhande ngo bishobora no guturuka ku guhararukwana kw’abashaknye kubera agahararo.Ariko ngo biranakwiye kuzirikana ko nta murongo uhuriweho mu isi ugenga imibanire kuko buri rugo rubaho ukwarwo kuko n’amateka y’abarugize aba adahuye.Uko biri kose ariko niba ubonye ibimenyetso birindwi bikurikira kuwo mwashakanye ushatse waba witegura gutandukana nawe kuko biba bica amarenga ko ahari urukundo urwango rugenda ruhataha

1. Niba akunze kugushyira mu ruhande rw’amakosa gusa

Bamwe mu bagore cyangwa abagabo usanga mu ngo bahora bereka abo bashakanye ko aribo bagowe(Jouer le/la vicime).Uzasanga niba habayeho gushyamirana yishyira mu ruhande rw’uwahohotewe akwereke ko ari wowe mugome.Kandi uko abikwinjizamo ugeraho ukabimenyera ku buryo n’aho yakosheje biba ngombwa ko usaba imbabazi.Mbese akwereka ko ntacyo ujya ukora kinoze,ko uhora mu makosa bigatuma n’icyo ukeka ko waba wakoze ukimubwira bityo akabona uko akuyobora.

2. Nta na rimwe ajya yishima

Uzasanga atajya yishimira icyo wamukorera cyose kabone n’ubwo wamanura ukwezi ntanyurwa abibonamo inenge mu gihe abakundana by’ukuri n’imyate y’uwo ukunda uyibonamo amaribori.Ahora abona ibyo ukora mu ruhande rubi gusa ku buryo nawe ubwe usanga ahorana umushiha n’ipfunnwe.

3. Ikibaye kibi kiba kiguturutseho

Niba ababaye ni wowe biturutseho kabone n’ubwo mwaba mutiriranwa agutura umujinya yakuye ahandi.Muhuye n’ibyago byo guhomba azakwegekaho amakosa kandi mwarigiye hamwe umushinga.

4. Ntimumarana n’isaha mudashyamiranye

Uzasanga iyo muri kumwe havuka amakimbirane waba udahari abandi bakakubwira ko aba yishimye.Bituma ahora ahimba impamvu zituma mubonana gake gashoboka.Urugero muri weekend ashaka impamvu zituma atirirwa mu rugo kuko aziko uhari.Nyamara umubwiye ko usohotse arishima ndetse akanabikorohereza.Ikibabaje ni uko niyo ugiye ugatinda atangira kukoherereza ubutumwa atakubaza niba waryohewe ahubwo akumenyesha ko watinze kandi nutaha ubiryozwa.

5.Ibyifuzo bye biza imbere y’ibyawe(egoisme exagere)

Uzasanga niba mubonye amafaranga azarwanira kuyacunga kandi mu nyungu ze ku buryo ashobora no kwibagirwa inyungu rusange z’urugo.Umuntu nk’uyu ntatinya gusesagura mu iraha rye bwite kandi mu rugo rukinga batanu.Azakubwira ko ipantalo ye(umugabo)cyangwa amavuta yisiga(umugore)aza mbere y’ibyo kurya byabatunga nk’umuryango.Kandi ibi niko byubahirizwa kuko uwo babana abyemera buhimyi atinya gukoma rutenderi yibwira ko amushimisha.

6. Arahindagurika mu bitekerezo

Uku guhuzagurika mu bitekerezo guturuka ku kuba aba arwanira kukwegekaho amakosa buri gihe bigatuma niba avuze ikintu cyakugira umwere yisubiraho agahindura imvugo ngo ukunde ukomeze kuba umunyacyaha.Urugero azakubwira ko kuba akivugana kenshi n’uwo bahoze bakundana atari uko akimukunda.Nyamara wamubwira ko ugiye guhamagara uwo mwahoze mukundana ku mpamvu zitari iz’ubuhehesi akakwamaganira kure akumvisha uburyo bidashoboka.

7. Agushyira hasi buri gihe

Uwo mwashakanye niba atajya akubona nk’igihangange ahubwo ahora akurebera mu ndorerwamo y’umunyantege nke uri mu mazi abira.Burya aba akugereranya n’uwo aha icyo cyubahiro ari nawe umuri mu mutima.Uwo mukundana ntarwanira kuguca amababa ngo unanirwe kuguruka ahubwo arwanira kuyaguha ngo mugurukane mu munezero.Uzasanga atanga ingero ku baturanyi ati ’ariko kuki utamera nka runaka ntubona ko akora ibi’???

Muvandimwe imibanire iratandukanye kandi irihariye.Ariko niba ubona byinshi muri ibi bimenyetso hagati yawe n’uwo mukundana cyangwa mwashakanye,menya ko wugarijwe no gutandukana nawe cyangwa kubaho nk’umucakara ubuzima bwabwe bwose.

KANDA HANO UREBE INKURU MU MASHUSHO