Kigali

Dore ibibi byo kugira umubano udasanzwe n’uwo mwakundanye mugatandukana

Urukundo   Yanditswe na: Muhire Jason 13 October 2018 Yasuwe: 1544

Nta muntu n’umwe mu buzima bwe wifuza kujya mu gitabo cy’amateka mabi yagize mu rukundo rwe rwa kera kuko bisa n’ikirango kibi cy’urwo rukundo. Ni ibintu bigaragaza ubwana n’ubwo bamwe bajijisha bakigaragaza nk’abakuze ku kijyanye n’imibanire bagirana n’abakunzi babo ba kera (aba ex).

Gukundana ni byiza, biraryoha kandi bikanezeza. Gusa nta gahora gahanze, bishobora kubaho ko watandukana n’uwo mwakundanye bitewe n’impamvu zinyuranye. Nta kibazo na kimwe kiri mu kuba wakifuriza ibyiza uwo mwakundanye mugatandukana, ntukanamwifurize ikibi n’ubwo mwaba mwaratandukanye nabi rwose. Gusa na none uzirinde kugirana ubushuti buhambaye n’uwo mwatandukanye kuko bishobora guteza ibibazo utatekerezaga. Mube inshuti ariko ntihagire ibijya kure.

Ushobora kwibaza impamvu z’ibi ukumva ntazo, twifashishije urubuka rwa Elcrema, tugiye kubagezaho zimwe mu mpamvu udakwiye kugirana umubano wihariye n’uwo mwakundanye mugatandukana:

1.BIZAKUBABAZA

Ushobora gutekereza guhora ubona umuntu mwakundanye, mwagiranye ibihe byiza by’urukundo, muziranye kuri byinshi ariko mutakiri kumwe uburyo byajya bihora bigushengura kumubona hafi yawe? Utekereza uburyo byakubabaza kuba utagifite uburenganzira bwo gukorana nawe ibyo mwakoranaga mbere no kutamwisanzuraho nk’uko byahoze? Ikindi ubwo bucuti bwimbitse bwajya burushaho kukubabaza umubonanye n’abandi ni yo mpamvu ya mbere tukugira inama yo kubyirinda. Mube inshuti bisanzwe ariko ntibikabye na gato.

2.BYAKUGORA GUTERA IMBERE

Aha ntihagire ubyumva nabi cyangwa ngo abyumve ukundi, ntabwo ibi biba kuri umwe muri abo baba baratandukanye ahubwo byababaho bombi uko ari babiri. Kuko akenshi usanga gutandukana ari gake bihurirwaho, kuko ushobora gusanga umwe adashaka ko uko gutandukana kubaho mu gihe undi aba yabisariye cyane. Akenshi uko gukomeza urukundo twakita ko rudashinga bigaterwa n’uko gutandukana kutumvikanyweho, bigatuma bakunda kubonana kenshi ndetse bamwe bakanashaka gusubirana. Ibi ubwabyo bigabanya umuvuduko w’iterambere ryanyu mu buzima busanzwe.

3.BITEZA IBIBAZO MU RUKUNDO RWAWE RUSHYA

Uramutse ubonye undi mukunzi, umubano udasanzwe waba ufitanye n’uwo mwatandukanye wakangiza bikomeye urwo rukundo rwawe rushya. Impamvu y’ibi ni uko umukunzi wawe mushya adashobora kwihanganira kukubonana kenshi n’umuntu uvuga ko watandukanye nawe. Uwo mukunzi wawe ni umuntu, birasanzwe ko abakundana bafuhirana, kukubonana n’uwo mwarekanye byateza ibibazo bikomeye mu rukundo rwawe rushya.

4.SI NGOMBWA RWOSE

Ni ukuri kose ntibikenewe ko ugirana ibyo twakita agakungu n’uwo mwatandukanye kuko nta n’impamvu yabyo. Reba ibindi bifite umumaro byaguteza imbere wubake ubuzima bwite bw’ejo hazaza. Ntimube abanzi rwose kuko si byiza, ariko na none ubushuti bwanyu bugire umupaka. Ntitwifuza ko waba umwanzi n’uwo mwatandukanye kuko mutakiri mu rukundo kuko ntibinakwiye rwose. Mube inshuti zisanzwe atari zimwe zihorana, mugire aho mugarukiriza ubwo bushuti bwanyu nta mpamvu yo kwisenyera cyangwa kwiyica mu mutwe.

Author : Muhire Jason

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