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Umukire tubereye mu nzu agiye kuntanya n’umugabo wanjye bitewe n’uburyo ateramo akabariro!Nkore iki?
Yanditswe: Tuesday 11, Sep 2018
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Nitwa Agnes ntuye Kibagabaga mu mugi wa Kigali, nashakanye n’umugabo wanjye nta kibazo nakimwe dufite mbese mu myaka 3 tumaranye ntawe uzi akababaro.
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Mbere na nyuma yo gushakana n’umugabo wanjye yari afite akazi karyoshye mbese ntacyo tubuze kuko yahembwaga amafaranga atubutse kuburyo twihazaga tukanasagurira imiryango.
Mu minsi ishize rero amasezerano y’akazi k’umugabo wanjye yaje kurangira maze akazi karahagarara nanjye iduka yari yaranshingiye ntangira gukuraho amafaranga yo kudutunga maze igenda nka nyomberi sinamenye aho ryanyuze.
Kuva ubwo twatangiye guhura n’ubuzima bubi inshuti zigera igihe ziraturambirwa kuko twabaga tubazengereje inzu twakodeshagamo tubura ayo kwishyura biraducanga.
Gusa ku bw’amahirwe umwe mu nshuti zacu yaduhaye inzu yo kubamo nyuma mbona akazi kampemba udufaranga ducye twifashisha ariko umugabo wanjye n’ubundi akomeza ari umushomeri.
Gusa nsubiye inyuma gato muri ibyo bihe umutware wanjye abuze akazi yatangiye gucika integer mu buriri ntahindukire ngo dukore imibonano mpuzabitsina, yanabikora agasa n’uwikiza cyangwa rimwe na rimwe igitsina cye ntigifate umurego.
Naje guhorana ako gahinda kuko njye nahoraga mbishaka ariko nkabura uko mbigenza nk’ihangana.
Mu minsi ishize rero wa mukire waduhaye inzu yo kubamo yanyegereye amba hafi tugirana umubano wihariye ndetse nza no gushiduka twaryamanye bintera ipfunwe ariko sinabihingukiriza umugabo.
Mu kwezi gushize rero yarongeye arampamagara ambwira hoteli musangamo ngezeyo anyumvisha buryoki nta mugore undusha gufata neza umugabo mu buriri nanjye natekereza ko ntabiherutse duhita twongera.
Mvugishije ukuri uwo mugabo nisanze ari mwiza mu buriri kuburyo numva nta wundi nifuza yewe n’umugabo wanjye maze kumwibagirwa pe!
Bitewe n’uburyo nsigaye ntekereza nkabura iherezo ryabyo nabifashishije ngo mungire inama!!
Ibitekerezo
Yewe madamu nkugire inama, nutava mubyo urimo urashenye birarangiye. Uwo mugabo arimo kuguprofita kuko yabatije inzu kandi abona umugabo wawe ari umuchomeur. Reka ibyo kuko mu minsi mike uratangira gusuzugura umugabo wawe umubone nk’icyo imbwa ihaze, guca inyuma uwo mwashakanye n’icyaha kigira ingaruka. Ihane, usenge Imana izahindura imibereho y’urugo rwawe.
Yewe mugore we,menya ko ibyo ukora ubiterwa n’amafaranga uwo Boss aguha.Ukaba ubeshyera umugabo wawe ko atabikora neza.Uko bigaragara,kubera ko uwo Boss agufata neza kandi akaba yarakwigaruriye,niwe usigaye ukunda kurusha umugabo wawe.Menya ko imana itubuza "gusambana" kandi abasambanyi batazaba mu Bwami bw’imana dutegereje nkuko 1 Abakorinto 6:9,10 havuga.Ntacyo bimaze kwishimisha usambana,hanyuma ukazabura ubuzima bw’iteka.Imana yaduhaye sex kugirango tuzayihe umuntu umwe gusa twasezeranye.Ibuka ko imana ivuga ko "uri umubiri umwe n’umugabo wawe" (Itangiriro 2:24).Muli make,imana ikubuza gusambana.Tinya imana,wishukwa n’ibyo uwo Boss aguha.Nubwo aguha amafaranga,ntabwo azakuzura ku munsi w’imperuka (Yohana 6:40).Koresha ubuto bwawe ushaka imana aho kubukoresha mu busambanyi.
Muvandimwe ndakumenyesha ko uko usa ubu uwo muboss akurikiranyeho harimo nuko uwo mugabo yagufashe mukibana kuko yahembwaga neza agushingira iduka.Kandi nawe yagukuragaho ubwo bwiza nuko wamufataga akabasha kukugirira ipfa none akazi karahagaze, ibibazo bibaye byinshi nawe uri gushakira ibyishimo kuwundi.Urumva se atari he atazahara ntanagushamadukire.Nkubwize ukuri ndi umugabo, wibaza ko atabizi ariko umugore wagiye mubandi bagabo urabimenya muburyo bumwe cg ubundi, nabyo bituma atagushaka kandi kwihangana by’abagabo ari kurenzaho kuko aragutera hejuru se akure inzu he yo kubamo na family.Ko kumugabo icumbi ari ikintu kigoye n’igisuzuguro iyo byakunaniye kuribonera abawe. Nkumenyeshe ko nabona akandi kazi kuko Imana ikiriza abayo mukwiheba no kwizera nibwo uzabona ko yari yarakubitse azaguta cg agutamaze families zibimenye ko wagiye mu buraya.
Ikindi uramenye uwo muboss utanyurwa n’umugore we ajya no mubandi bakobwa/abagore azakuzanira kabutindi nk’indwara zandurira mu mibonano mpuzabitsina uzarahurire uwo muziranenge wawe wugarijwe n’ubukene wowe wanaciye ku mahotel wakiriwe nyuma bakakwishimiraho! Ese nkubwo niba mutikingira nusamira umwana muli ubwo buhemu urimo urumva utitegurira ibikomere mu hazaza hawe.Wihemuka pe arakubeshya ko ubutanga neza ariko azaguharurukwa aharare undi, abirukane ujye wicuza ukuntu yakwidindagaho. Ca akenge muvandimwe hari benshi bagezweho barangiza nabi nabo bababeshyaga.
Nsoza ndakwibutsa ko Imana yo mwijuru itishimira ubusambanyi mu gihe uzaba ugeze ku iherezo ry’ubuzima uzicuza ibyo utazagarukana kuko uri mu busambanyi.Soma (abaheburayo/Hebrews 13:4) Hinduka ukorere Imana, musangire ubusa nuwagushimye akakwereka Imana mu isezerano rya marriage, imigisha izabagenderera mubone akazi ubuzima bugaruke kuruta iryo raha ry’akanya gato, n’inzu yintizanyo. Kandi nyuma niwegera umugabo no muli ibyo bibazo uzabona yarakugarukiye ajye ateraho akabariro. Humura ntarwaye nibibazo si ubundi burwayi yagize.
iyonisidaushakantakindi mbabajwe niyonteragahinda yarumugabo agikize noneamazegcyena ngontabishoboye urambabajepe!
Sha wowe urindaya mpuza mahanga umugabo wawe angifite ikwaca yarashoboye akazi kose nonubu kubera ubukene butuma umugabo atikubitira umugore yabaye rubebe uri mubi hubwo
Ni automatic iyo umugabo afite stress z’imibereho ibyimibonano ntabwo wabimuzanaho.ariko nawe uri ruharwa ese bitaba n’ubukene akarwara indwara ituma abireka burundu ntiwabaho warara upfuye!abagore tugerageze twiyubahe twubahishe abatware bacu nubwo baba batagishoboye inshingano zo muburiri kuko niko baremye ntabwo babihindura.
Ariko se aba bagore baba bariye ibiki ko hari bamwe tuba twarabaye ibinya! iri ringaniza rubyaro naryo rigiye kuzatera abagore kuba indaya kera ba mama bababyaragamo 7 ubundi bakirirwa bunamye mumirimo bukira umugongo watandukanye ninayompamvu ntamwanya bagiraga wo kwiruka mubitagira umumaro.none ubu umugabo arakubyaramo 1 ukaguma ugisa nkuko wasaga icyamuha akabaraga ngo akubyaremo nka 4 ubundi uzongere ibyo wirirwamo sha!
NDUMVA NTANAMA TWAMUGIRA KUKO NTIYABASHIJE KWIHANGANIRA UMUGABO IBIHE YARARIMO BITOROSHYE BYOKUBURA AKAZI,ARINABYO BYATE KUTABASHA GUTERA AKABARIRO.INAMA YARAYIHAYE UBWO YAHITAGAMO KUMUCA INYUMA.
Utubwiye ubugome bwawe, nta nama wadusabye kuko warayigiriye. Washimangiye wa mugani ko "iyo ubukene bwinjiriye mu muryango, umugore aca mu idirishya..." Wibagiwe ibyo wamusezeranije imbere y’uwari ahagarariye idini mwasezeraniyemo. kereka niba mutarasezeranye kuko byo utabitubwiye.